The Illusion Is My Truth

I stare at the passengers, but see
None of the myriad people before me.
I see a land locked away in my memories
And a sudden smile – in my dreams I see.
But the fantasy is so real, so vivid.
Why should I ever let go?

I know the absurdity of life,
That I am happy… SO HAPPY!
And the hurt tears my insides,
The pain rips apart my body.
Like the survivor of a shipwreck
I still cling to what I know.

I have so much to give, so much
Love to offer my beloved.
My helplessness mocks me
“What have you received?”
I still give my shadow smile
My phantom hand touches the same.

And they kiss and then they laugh
Those pairs on the train never part.
I alone shut my eyes, I lean back
And a tiny flicker grows in my heart.
No wind can blow out its glow.

But no wind will fan it into flame.